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Man to Man with Wooly D (well, I SAY man…)

Posted by drew | Posted on Friday, May 18th, 2012

| at 2:12 pm
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Well it’s been a ruddy long time since I’ve attempted one of these. In the words of Kier Kemp at the start of ‘A Note to the Rescuers…’ – “God knows how I’m going to start this!”

Though perhaps writing a blog is like riding a neon pink and green, chevron patterned hoverboard through the centre of Hill Valley in the year 2015 – it’ll come in handy when you travel back to 1885 and have to help save your best mates new country fling from falling off a suped-up steam training hurtling towards a ravine…

I think there’s a proverb in there somewhere, but it beyond my fractured woollen brains ability to sort it out so COCK IT and let’s get on with the show!!!

As Senor Bevuardo (AKA Lord Grand High Overload of the Bloggosphere) has already said on this page and as we have tweeted the hell out of it 24/7 our album is finally out gallivanting about town and we’re, to say the least, pleased as punch! You might even colour us tickled pink – but that saying disturbs me – so it’s best to say we’re absolutely chuffed and leave it at that methinks. The most amazing thing is all the positive feedback and support you guys have been giving (I can’t believe so many people have multiple copies of our album – I thought it’d just be my mum!!) as there’s always that fear when putting something out that everyone might just call it a “Shit sandwich” and buy the CDs just to construct a scythe-like weapon to kill us…but, fortunately, that hasn’t happened (yet) so it just leaves me to say thank you very much: Thank YOU very much, without you lot we’d be naff all.

It’s weird to think that just a week ago we were completely destroyed on the football pitch by any band we threw ourselves in front of. To be fair I don’t think our blood-alcohol level wouldn’t have been acceptable for any professional sports team – and we successfully danced about like the bunch of fairies we are (except for Luke – he’s actually a REAL man, oi oi) as you can see here in this photomorphic evidisation:

 

Mad props to Ruth, Kit and Tom (from Ugly love, check them mothers out they’re awesome @uglyloveband), Jake (FVKs resident tattooist) and $tevil for filling out our team of misfits and doing glorious battle on the green.

 Anything else exciting? Nah probably not it’s just -  OH WAIT! We’re going on tour with f;;king William Control and Obscure Pleasures in a week and a flipping day!!!!!!!!! Seriously can’t wait to hit the open road and play sweet, sweet, sweaty, metal(ish) rock music and hang out with some lovely people (That’s you guys just so y’know :P ) I think we might have spontaneously combusted if it weren’t for HRH Sir Prince William Control taking us along with him on this merry little UK jaunt so come one, come all and join the party!

 

Well that’s that, see you in another life – Boom, boom, boom!

Drew (doth playeth thee basso-continuo)

xxxx

 

Ll’z Bellz… MOTL IS OUT!

Posted by Laurence | Posted on Wednesday, May 16th, 2012

| at 5:15 pm
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EVERYWHERE!

On iTunes, In HMV on Amazon (who amazingly managed to sell out of their first shipment last night, so thank you!) and now even our own merch store! http://www.backstreet-merch.com/stores/fearlessvampirekillers/ And FYI we ship ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD! Huzzar!

So quick round up of what we’ve been up to.

  • Editing our new video, which started off as a nightmare but has become a joy, due to new software and the five of us being - simply put GENIEYE (yes that’s a word in Bevictionary)
  • Recording B-sides. Yes the new single needs something special with it, elsewise – why the hell would you want it!? Being already on the album an’ all.
  • Doing the comic for Rocksound! Check it out here http://www.rocksound.tv/features/article/read-an-exclusive-fearless-vampire-killers-comic-strip it gives a taste of what’s to come in the MOTL album story, simply titled GRANDOMINA.
  • Rehearsing like a bag full of Pokeballs on the way to Indigo Plateau to fight in the Indigo League. Why? Download. We need to be good!

So yeah, we’re powering through, and we’re super excited for the New Faith Tour with William Control starting on the 26th of May in Cardiff. Going to be super fun, epicosstastic time-times!

So, back to the flavour of the month – Militia Of The Lost!

 

That’s me in Oxford Street HMV with it. I kid you not, they put it in the chart next to the Dark Shadows soundtrack completely by chance! Was super bizarre, so thank you, staff of HMV Oxford St! Sadly the experience of seeing our record in shops for the first time, was slightly marred by the fact that the deluxe edition was nowhere to be seen. The reason we were so disgruntled was because we’d been told it was going to be in stores, and that the jewel case ones were only there to provide a cheaper alternative. That was unfortunately not true. However, you can now order the deluxe from our site, or from amazon, which is better for us because it makes our distributor happy!

Meanwhile, I got a new nerf gun monday.

 

And you see, @drewfvk, @barronefvk and I made a celebratory film in honour of the new weapon. But… @kierfvk won’t let us put it up. Maybe you should hassle him. ; )

However I do have a video of Jack, my good friend, dressed as a Victorian soldier demonstrating the gun he’s going to buy me from hamley’s when he gets paid next month. He’s so good to me!

Until my next letter, or never…

Laurence ;;

P.S. don’t think the party’s over yet. It’s only just starting up!

 

Ll’z Bells Kool Kat Kareening Kblog!

Posted by Laurence | Posted on Wednesday, May 2nd, 2012

| at 5:25 pm
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Sillviar draws a tin of sugar cubes and a flask of ice-cold water from the cabinet, “Naturally history has provided us with many of the truths caught up in that great drama surrounding the foundations of Grandomina, but some things aren’t so clear,” he lays a sugar cube on the spoon and proceeds to bathe it in the icy water, “King Ruple III – Roopsey the Troube – announced on the day of his coronation that he was not in fact the son of Rex but of Ruple the Angel king! And that Ruple the Angel had taken his brother’s wife – the most severe betrayal imaginable – all for the sake of this calamity they call love! But how did this happen? Why would Evelyn marry Rex in the first place when we all know she and Ruple had met previously and that there had been an immediate attraction? Was it her parents pushing her? The similarity in the brothers’ appearance? Or greater powers—”

That’s from the story that goes along side the songs off of Militia Of The Lost, the first chapter of which will come with the album itself. Party times mah-fah! (^+^)

Anyhoo. I liked the idea of starting this blog with something separate to the main body of it, but now… Well I’ll guess I’ll just have to dive straight into it with-

FOUR FUCKING KS WHAT!?!?!?

Our album that’s what! It’s difficult to express how much this means to me and the rest of the band. As with our 8/10 review in Rocksound, this is something that no one can ever take away from us. No matter what we do, and how much flak we get, we can always say, “Hey, we have an album that got 4ks in Kerrang! Who cares if Rolling Stone thinks we’re a piece of shit!” (this hasn’t happened, it’s just a scenario.)

I remember back in 2004 re-reading Kerrang’s KKKK review for American Idiot over and over – it had this great list of George Bush’s most nonsensical quotes at the bottom and though I disagreed with parts the review, it was a snazzy article. And now there we are, naturally we’re nothing on green day, but it’s just great to be recognized by such a recognisable rock institution as being something good, a band worth listening to. So please go out an buy the mag if you can (this weeks issue Matt Tuck and Liam Cormier of Axewound on the front), in it there’s a saucy pic of me and Kier illustrating my statement to the Homophobes, and there’s also something about us getting nominated for some award.

“Hang on, take that a step back. What award?”

Oh dang it! I knew you’d catch me out. BEST BRITISH NEWCOMER AT THE KERRANG AWARDS! We’ve been nominated alongside some killer bands as quite frankly the best new thingammy bobs in British rock. ; ) But seriously, that’s pretty humbling, and we’ve got you guys to thank for it; all you Killers, FVKuddlebuds and Lost Hearts. If this was Battlestar Galactica, you’d all be Lee Adama in a Viper with Starbuck kicking tin can-cold Cylon ass!

But the works not done, no, not at all. We need you guys to keep voting, like never before! And then we might win, and we can spread this message of geeky lovidovi-gothiness all across the multiverse! So go here http://awards.kerrang.com/ and make love to those syrupy, vacant, pink text fields, and spray your sweet information goodness into them again and again. Then watch as the FVK collective smile broadens!

LET’S ROCK!

Until my next letter, or never…

Laurence

P.S. The Beverswithanerfasjamesfrackingbond contest is going swimmingly! I think I’m going to announce the winners on Friday. Though submissions end tonight at 7. So far I’ve had loads of brilliant entries. And here’s one of many epic slabs of art. You guys are just too artistic!

 

Ll’s Bellz iss on the march! Busywizyness!

Posted by Laurence | Posted on Tuesday, April 24th, 2012

| at 1:30 pm
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Last week on our mini tour with JGTG and co, Jack JGTG’s guitarist reminded me of a game we used to play when we were kids. We’d sit in my attic on a break from song writing, hammering away for hours at this nonsensical crowd-combat fighting game called Dynasty Warriors 2. What the hell is a “crowd-combat fighting game?” you ask clutching your copy of the new Soulcalibur game. Well, it’s an interesting beast the old CCF.

Instead of the restrictive place mat one must do battle on in Soulcalibur and the first Dynasty Warriors game, DW2 lets the player have the freedom to roam the map as they please. Additionally, rather than fighting one on one with their opponents, they will come across hundreds of foes at once, all requiring the gamers bloodthirsty attention. It’s great because it keeps the use of combos such as you’d find in a normal Beat ‘em up, but you can also get on a horse and gallop about the plains of china! You get body guards a well. F;;k yeah!

“Ok so what the hell was all that about? We don’t care about silly little putagames!”

Well what I’m trying to say is… At the moment, I kind of feel like I’m in a crowd-combat fighter! Like I’m in Dynasty Warriors 2! Hacking away at steel clad warriors from my horse, all of them disguised as interviews and music videos. Take that, Homophobes! Have this poisoned dart, Interview! Suck on my mace, Music Video! And on tour the numbers of assailants treble, I’m hacking at everyone in this hazed, lusty frenzy! It’s fracking awesome! We’re Dynasty Warriors and we’re fighting for the unification of China!

So I guess, what I’m trying to say it that we’re sorry if some things come a bit late. But we’ve loaded a lot on ourselves, and there’s more stuff coming in at every angle. Naturally we love it! Just like I loved playing Dynasty Warriors 2. But sometimes you get a couple of scrapes. Maybe even an arrow in the eye… So if my tweets are a couple of days late. This stuff is why. + the fact that I waste a lot of time playing with Nerf guns! (^o~) This is the one I got on Saturday just before our epic show with Evarose at the Vault in Rugby. It’s a classic model.

Also I just want to quickly acknowledge this photo on our website. It’s a pretty cool thing going round to your favourite rock photographer’s house to sign some prints he’s done of you. If any one wants one I think there are a very limited amount left here – http://www.paulharries.com/photo_9226840.html

 

Until my next letter, or never…

Laurence ;;

P.S. Hope y’all enjoyed Could We Burn, Darling? on Johnny Dooms Kerrang! Radio show. I suppose it’s hard to hide what the next single is now! (^+^)

 

Mini Tour, Bizarre, Radio 1 and Kerrang = yum

Posted by Laurence | Posted on Friday, April 20th, 2012

| at 5:58 pm
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Sooo. These past few days we is been busy boys ain’t it! Where to beguine? Umm… arr… umm… arr. Ok how about here…

MONDAY – LEEDS.

So on Monday us boys got in our cheeky little van Opti-miss-prime to begin an ass kicking mini tour adventure. Short story: about two months back, before the pigeon hit the rotor blade, we was MISERY GUTS. No one wanted to drag our puffy little faces on tour, and we were a’ moaning about it. We just wanted to play shows but no one wanted to have us. WAH WAH WAH. Fast forward a month and we decide to take matters into our own hands. We asked where you guys wanted us to play and we noticed that our good friends Johnny Get The Gun were playing in a few of the areas requested. “Hmm.” We thought… “Let’s ask them if we can hijack their shows!” Jack – JGTG’s guitar chap – was kind enough to have us on his band’s tour. Cheers Jack! *End of short story.

So where were we? Oh yeah. LEEDS. So we set off to get to Leeds and immediately got sidetracked, having to help some guy jump start his car. Shane and I decided to be a little mischievous and pretended that we’d broken down! LOLOLOLOLOL!! We hadn’t though. It was all a RUSE! On route we picked up our tour manager, the lovely https://twitter.com/#!/318tourmanager We got to Leeds and met all the bands, Goodbye Sky Harbour, Neon Sarcastic and Double A. All were lovely cats. The gig owned heavy balls and we got some raditek news just after we played. “Tonight you’re on Dan Carters show on Radio 1!” FUCK YEAH! Even our grand parents know what radio 1 means. Huzzar. Success!

TUESDAY – MANCHESTER.

Manchester was awesome. Got there and Trish was outside with goodies. MMM. Went into the city and had a rip-roaring time at an independent comic shop before hitting Nero with the latest copy of Bizarre to find ourselves gracing its pages. Bizarre > Lads Mags. Cheers Bizarre. Then we did an interview with the ass kicking haunted gents at http://www.banterbanter.net/ before playing a big fat rock show. Was epic like ducks in the rain. Afterward we drove to Dave’s and tried to play Time Crisis. Went and slept in the van like the night before. COMFY AS F;;K!

WEDNEEESDAY – LONDON (no show).

In the morning Drew, Luke and I went to war with Nerf Guns. Was so epic it hurt. Wrestled Kerrang! off an elderly lady in a Warrington Newsagents to find out we’d been awarded 4 ks for our barfly show! FANKOO! So we went to Asda to celebrate and I purchased the next gen of Nerf Weaponry.

When we got home, Kier and I went to watch Ancient Vvisdom at the Old Blue Last. And – still in a great mood - I bought a polite homeless guy a bottle of Newcastle Brown Ale. The band AVV were awesome, and also top chaperoones.

THURSDAY - SOUTHAMPTON.

A castle, coffee in a fuck-off big mall, and another fantastic show (in my mind). It was great meeting a whole host of new people, as well of course, some old ones (^o^) and we were loving the cogs and the minging sweets. So, party times had by all.

Peace and Fucking! Believe!

Until my next letter, or never…

Laurence ;;

 

DOWNLOAD/BARFLY/FACEDOWN

Posted by Laurence | Posted on Tuesday, April 10th, 2012

| at 4:57 pm
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We must have been about 16. Kier, Shane and I with all our mates sat in our friends living room in the middle of rural Norfolk. All of us are wide eyed and silent; we’re watching System Of A Down headline download. To think we’d ever get to go to the festival, let alone play there seemed nigh on impossible, even laughable at the time. But somehow, here we are. Sure, we’re not headlining, but it’s a hell of a start. Definitely a dream come true.

In other news, this weekend was super busy. Firstly I’d like to thank everyone from the bottom of our hearts for coming out to Barfly with us!  You literally blew us away and sold it out. In fact it went 30 over capacity so thank you! It’s a damn shame about the abusive security and the way we were all turfed out like pig-shit after the show. But what can you do. I’m going to try my best not to let that happen again. But still, all that couldn’t ruin seeing a hundred people sing Bow Ties right back at us.

On Friday we played Face Down, which was nuts. First time we’ve ever played at 1am before. Ended the show with a squirt in the face of Jack Daniels from a load of burlesqe dancers who had joined the stage for our last song. Who said rock and roll was dead? Big thanks to Stu and Claudia for getting us on the show, and sorry to those I didn’t get a chance catch up with. It was super hectic!

Then I went away and lived it up for a day and a half. Got back about midnight Sunday, and was up at five for… I guess it’s kind of all over the place as so many people were tweeting about it, so I can’t really keep it a secret… The next video. The day was super hectic, and it’s probably the most complex shoot we’ve had to do. All I can say is it’s the prequel to Bow Ties and you get to meet the girl who’s hair is blazing fire.

Until my next letter, or never…

Laurence ;;

P.S. That was the big news. But only part of it.

 

WHAT THE HELL!? William Control Tour That’s What!

Posted by Laurence | Posted on Tuesday, April 3rd, 2012

| at 2:24 pm
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What on earth could this be? It couldn’t, could it? Surely Fearless Vampire Killers are doomed to traverse the cold desolate highways alone, playing shows to the faithful at any shack that will hold them? They couldn’t possibly be going on tour? Could they? COULD THEY!?

The answer is yes. They could, they can and they is. We’ve spent ages whinging and whining, “why will no-one take us on tour!?”, well the time for wingery is OVER! Our good friend, the crown prince of being dangerous, Will Control, is taking us on tour. What a guy! : )

But seriously “We’re really doing it, Harry!” This is so exciting for us. It’s fair getting all this press and shit, but what we always wanted most was to play for you all. And now we can! *fires a the happy gun at the ceiling in joy*.

I’m excited! Be excited with me and have a glass of fizz! Alcoholic or non, I don’t care! But at this moment in time – well me and the band are just the happiest we’ve been in ages. : )

Until my next letter, or never…

Laurence ;;

P.S. This news is big but it STILL isn’t the big news we’ve been harping on about for ages. xxxx

 

VIRTUALLY 0% FAT! KERRANG! QUIZ!

Posted by Laurence | Posted on Friday, March 30th, 2012

| at 12:29 pm
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No I’m not talking about Freshways virtually 0% fat skimmed pasteurised and homogenised milk. I’m talking about Kier Kemp, FVK’s stick thin resident dunce, taking KERRANGS ULTIMATE ROCK STAR QUIZ and getting… Dun dun dun… 25 out of a hundred odd!

Watch it and pray for his silly little soul!

Spread it if you can, we want everyone in the rocking world to know how stupid this band really is : ) !!!

In other trubles, tonight (we think and hope) we have some mahoosive nuuus! Still not the big bastard mah-fah rockin’ nuuus we promised before, but this is still goanna. OWN.

Until my next letter, or never…

Laurence

;;